Party.. like no tomorrow ;)

the party was awesome..
everyone seems to enjoyed every single moment of it...
i saw a lots of couples :P


kinda makes me emo somehow
the trouble that i have..
keep on stirring my head upside down..


the rain.. drizzling..
makes me thought of.... regret...
but what is done.. is done! .


now i swear that i'm not gonna do the same mistake again! never.!
well. i don't know what else to say..


just now fell down of the slides..
kinda injured my back bone.. fvck..
finally.. again.. i felt that.. i'm so useless..
i can't do anything correctly ..
well except playing with fire..


watched the fire burned the leaves.. to ashes..
how nice if .. we can burn certain memory ..
into nothing.. but ashes..


maybe i should stop being so emo...
i must not think back the past...
i must move forwards!
i must improvise!


<Gambateh>

when things come too easily ~ u will not appreciate it~ ok ok~ so must work hard for it~
next time i wont give high hopes~
i must control myself~
i won't kill myself

I read a story today~ it's a very touching story~ tsk tsk T^T
~ ~
Story Title: IF ONLY


10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the guy next to me. He
was my so called "best friend". I stared at his dark, messy hair, and wished he was mine. But he didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, he walked up to me and asked me for the notes he had missed the day before and i handed them to him. He said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade

The phone rang. On the other end, it was him. He was in tears, mumbling on and on about how his homies had left him. He asked me to come over because he didn't feel like being alone, so I did. As I sat next to him on the sofa, I stared at his beautiful, brown eyes, wishing he was mine. After 2 hours, one basketball movie, and three bags of chips, he decided to go to sleep. He
looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year

The day before prom he walked to my locker. "My date is sick" he said; she's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, we were standing at my front door step! I stared at him as he smiled at me and stared at me with his crystal eyes. I want him to be mine, but he isn't thinking of me like that, and I know it. Then he said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day

A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as his perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get his diploma. I wanted him to be mine, but he didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone
went home, he came to me in his smock and hat, and I cried as I hugged him. Then he lifted my head from his shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later

Now I sit in the pews of the church. That guy is getting married now. I watched him say "I do" and drive off to his new life, married to another woman. I wanted him to be mine, but he didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before he drove away, he came to me and said "you came!". He said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral

Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a guy who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a letter that he had wrote during his high school years. This is what it read:
I stare at her wishing she was mine, but she doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish she would tell me she loved me!
I wish I did too... I thought to my self, and I cried.




oh well i can write a good story from this x)~ hehe ~ want try to make the examiners to cry :P coz of my essay :P~ hehe ~ 


Good News ~ there is a HIGH percentage im goin to fail my maths and sejarah :P~ 


english, perdagangan, Science ~ all improve :D nice ~ ~ my perdagangan teacher said~ 


Pn Azizah(Perdagangan Teacher): Eh~ Biar betul Raymond nii~ dulu fail perdagangan ~ sekarang ~ pass pulak~ tiru arrr ~ 


LmaO! i where got so bad~ x) im a good student! hehe x))

Guess no one is reading this :P hehe~ maybe~ but i don't know~ the future is uncertain~ I can't believe i'm stucked when writing stories in exam hmm~ but oh well at least english paper 1 i wrote about 2. As i read the paper i cried.... bla bla bla :P

THE SUMMARY! >

the story revolves eons ago ~ A prince Named Arthas Menethil was born four years before the outbreak of the first war between Humans And Orcs.. King Terenas and Queen Lianne Were Joyed and all of Lordareon Celebrates Arthas Birthday~

He Was taken as An Apprentice of uther Lighbringer ~ the Leader Of The Kinights Of Silver Hand.... At the age of 19 Arthas was given the Holy Mace called Light's Vengeance..

In The Age of 23 years old he was sent to Investigate A Plague that had gripped the Northland. With The Assistance of Jaina Proudmoore and Captain FAlric, they encountered the Necromancer  Kel'Thuzad in the town of Brill. Kel'Thuzad Already Infected the grain from Andorhal and shipped it to outlying villages. Before Arthas killed him~ he spoke of Mal'Ganis a demon who led the Scourge.

When he arrived .. ahh i'm so lazy to type :P here's the link for the Prince Of Darkness http://www.wowwiki.com/Arthas_Menethil ~ enjoy :P the story line is quite long making it interesting ;)

when the time comes~ u will eventually know how this positive thinking positive feedback works~ but let me tell you a little secret to make it happen~ in order to work this positive thinking abilities~ 1 must be freed from your daily routine~ and doesn't have obstacles in mind path~ so that u can think indirectly out of your mind and connect to this positive thinking power~ you can feel the power thru meditation~ but it is the 1 fate that to meet such power~ ~ and Positive Thinking works Greater with the power of WILL~ example~ YOU wish the world will become a Better Place~ there is like millions of people also wish for this~ of course it will happen~ ~ 2nd if u wish to achieve great marks in your exam ~ 1 must take the initiative to study! you can just sit there and do nothing~ eventually u can't achieve great marks in your exam~ you must help yourself ~ you can't just sit there and wish for it ~  but Positive thinking does leads to Positive Mood~ our brain have the power to change the world~ can good exist without evil? can there be light without dark? can there be positive without negative? can there be hot without cold? can there be food without hungry?~ and the answer is No~ if something exist The POLAR Opposite must Also Exist~ ~ bad side always exist in our life~ so we must control it :) Good luck ~ i can see u have a long life to live~ i learned palm reading~ hehe :) GAMBATEH! u can Make it HAPPEN! it is whether u want or not :D

suffering.. when u are down! you must climb up! this is the path that u have to explore on your own.. but.. if u really in need of help .. gimme a call.. i will be there.. don't worry..

back from work... become a dish washer =="... came home my bro scream at me d ... gila.. want use my laptop PLEASE USE A GOOD MANNER! TO TALK! GIVE U THIS U WANT MORE! ... haiz...

you still don't understand... what i love about u is not the outer beauty... what i love is you~ just you... If u become ugly i also still love u.... the inner beauty.. thats what i love about u... even thou u crush my hear a lil.. i still with fix it... i will never give up..

here is the poem i promise you

Sorry

Sorry is useless..
Sorry no cure....
Sorry can't make any big changes...
But i'm still saying sorry...

Sorry Gives Me HOPE
There is still a lil HOPE
....
Sorry Did make changes! but it is a small changes ...
depends on people...

Forgive...

I'm truly sorry...(that's all i think i said sorry to much)

today... it's quite a tough day.. but i will still have to endure it~... after i saw you entered your mom's car~ only i left~ cycled back home slowly~ my mind was full with WHY..  but i don't want to answer it~ i refused to answer my own head... at the MPSJ...

Saw you from a distance..
Saw you from the seats...
something about the look in your eye...
something about your beautiful face...
In a sea of people...
there is only you in my eye...

hmmm~
everytime i look at your face..
I'm trying to figure out what you are currently thinking...
but i failed.. and i won't give up.... Why?!

Because I love you more than myself...

my friend called me stalker... yes i stalk u so badly today...
u do noticed... but that time..
i wasn't stalking at u~ i just happened to saw u there... then u looked at me.. hmmm

my friend called me psycho, crazy bastards... i don't care what they call me.. i will still do crazy things...

i feel like crying... but i don't want to... i want to feel ... what is the feeling u felt right now... i don't want to express it... tough round...

exam is coming... i will do my best .. i will show u my potential.. ... i will teach u after i got A's for my maths..

I hope u are reading this...

i'm going off to work ... bye...

what a AWESOME DAY! :D didn't get enough rest :D got heavy eyebag d :P (Y)~ today get to marching again! how i missed marching when i was a scout lol~ today too SEMANGAT d ! tomorrow must more SEMANGAT! FOR PURPLE HOUSE! green house can sleep at home d lol xD~ today marching i used heavy foot steps STOMP the mud hehe~ *piak *piak *piak lol~ AoE is quite wide lol ~ hmmmm i didn't even looked for u today~ hehe fate brought us together rite? do u want to admit it lol~ :P lol.... i dont want to say this :P u say ya~ i say errr....no :P~ lol my mistake :P next time i must be more perasan hehe~ after that go see audition~ hmmm for Hari Guru~ LOL to the Geng Bas Sekolah~  quite amusing thou~ ..

Lastly today i met 2 thieves! both also girl D: 1 short hair.. 1 long hair! everyone please be careful xD! they stole my bicycle ! and cycle it to tuition LOL! but it was quite fun lol~ long time didn't run d lol~
 

THATS all FOR TODAY! :D (Y) i'm so freaking HAPPY TODAY! :D

what a bad day again~ why bad things always happened to me~ ==" zz~
today~ morning headache ~ after assembly want buy mineral water~ mr selva stopped me ==" ~ haiz~ sick oso cannot buy water is it?! zz~ then~ fine lor borrow from friend lor~ at least i gave u the album :) and bubble tea :)... at home~ 3 hours of fixing my laptop failed~ zz system freaking hard to fix! after that want to get a drink~ got scratch by the metal table ==" oh great ~ been long time didn't see blood~ nearly face plant =="~ tuition time delayed again~ 7 start until 9~ haiz~ dunno wat to say liao~~~ .................

ok lar :D i shall treat my mom better :)~

lol~ today went to taipan kfc~ breakfast~ *pui ~ terrible lol~ and then go home ~ then relax for a while go back taipan again~ lol~ i search almost all the cd shop`~ cant find the album ==" lol~ so cycle to summit lor~ at popular~ more funny~ i asked the worker~ 有没有买 "wu ke qun" the CD? ~ then they told me 五kuai qian de cd?? go stock clearance la! ~ HAHHAHA damn lol! then dont care lor~ i find it on my own~ in the end~ i FOUND IT! LAST PIECE! :DD Awesome :D tomorrow bring to school~ lol "xing ni cai guai" hehe see lar xD

:(

What a Cold day~ it's like winter ~ when i'm cycling back home with the pants soaked with rain water~ and it's still drizzling ~ @7.00P.M~ i'm really tired~ i didn't cycle like what i did usually ~ what is happening to me~ i feel stress~ sometimes i can't think out of the box~ i'm stuck in my own mind maze~ i'm not the master in my own brain ~ i lost myself...... just now tried to find u ~ but failed~ didn't see u in class~ must be in the lab~ i guessed it right~ haiz~ then going home time~ i saw u again~ ... but~ i'm toooo late again~ i saw u entered your mom's car~ haiz~ don't know what to do~ i feel like sleeping~ and wake up with nothing in my brain~ is like reset button for few hours~ next time must try to smile but today cannot lar~ :(

x(

well~ school is getting hotter~ and now is raining~ wow~ 26 degree @6.32A.M Currently ~~~ and i thought i'm the only 1 sick~ but~ u are sick 2 Lol~ wat a coincidence eh~ yalar ~ why sleep late~ see~ sick d ~ LoL~...
wow~ i didnt know 1 can play with their mucus... xD Teach Me! :D~~ yesterday after chatting with u~ 10:26 P.M my system down ~ slept at Sofa~ then woke up at 6.20 ~ at the floor d ~ what happened yesterday? OmG >< ~ hmm~ in your case i have just the solution for u! :D

Steps

1

1

1. Do the right thing. If you know your problem is too big to ignore then get up and do something about it. Whether that be seeing a therapist, talking to a friend or family member or undoing a wrong, determine what it is that needs to be done to help heal your negative feelings and get you on your way. It's important to remember that if you don't do anything about it now, it's still going to be hanging over you later. Remember - the only way out is through.

2.Be positive. Stop that flow of negative thoughts, and you'll be amazed at how much your life will change. Alter the way you see things. See the light in everything, be grateful for all that you have and don't let yourself bask in self pity or resentment or bitterness. Find things to look forward to each day and be thankful for the small stuff - a roof over your head, a nice day, a good friend - anything.

3.Smile. Stop frowning and being miserable and force yourself to smile. Moping will drag you down, so don't give yourself a chance to get stuck into it. Smile every day, no matter how meaningless or plain stupid it may seem.

4.Find people to help you feel better. This is most definitely the time to work on your relationships with friends and families - anybody in your life. Strengthen your friendships and work on your social skills. Don't isolate yourself in a time of need - reach out! Talk to people everyday, get some human contact to make you feel better. Even if it takes some forcing, make yourself socialise with the people you care about - and remember that they care about you, too.

5.Distract yourself. Keep yourself busy. Finish that to do list, set yourself goals to continually work towards. Pick up some new hobbies. Read, write, draw, sing, or play an instrument. Even simple chores like cleaning the house can get your mind off things. Doing productive, useful tasks make you feel like you're not wasting your life but actually achieving something, no matter how small. If you don't feel up to working or can't commit yourself, remember you can still distract yourself - call a friend the moment you feel down, dig out your favourite DVD or go for a walk. Taking your mind off things and giving yourself a "time out" period regularly helps you chill out and get away, as well as keeping you away from sinking into a depression again.

6.Be your own best friend. Don't be unkind to yourself - reward yourself for your strength and courage instead. After all, you've made it this far, right? You deserve a reward. Treat yourself by splurging out on money, kicking back and relaxing, doing anything you want. Stop any harsh, self destructive thoughts. Tell yourself "I love myself" every day when you look in the mirror, even if you feel like the world is crashing around you. Your mind is your number one coping resource, so look after it well, feed it with information, and of course, give it affection! Hating yourself will get you nowhere, since you're stuck with you for a long time anyway.

Tips

• Exercise is good for anger, depression, or just feeling terrible in general. Exercise is proven to release the same chemical in your brain that is used in anti depressants, and it's healthier, too. Find an activity you enjoy and take it up regularly.
• Don't lash out at the people close to you, because they care about you and deep down, you really do know that, somewhere in yourself. Don't treat others unkindly, and the same goes for yourself.
• If you've been eating badly, stick to a healthier diet. It'll make you feel better, is good for you and will probably make you look better, too.
• If your grades have been dropping, or your work performance, work hard to raise and maintain it. Don't let yourself go and lose everything important to you.

Warnings

Some severe issues cannot just be pushed away using these methods - you need to work on step 1 first. Therapy, thinking things through and acting accordingly can all take time, up to months, perhaps a year or more.

..........................................................................................................................

Gooc Luck~ :D

zZ feel sleepy~ but i must endure it ~ AHhh!~

What A Day~ lol today can describe as a awesome day and tragic day~ hmmm~
today in school~ okay lar~ at least i drank a chocolate milk~ hmm chocolate taste~ Hmm~ thank you very much ~ :D really appreciated it~ next time MY TREAT :D ~ after came back from home~ damn lol~ Wws followed me home~ "Get in! Coast Is Clear! Go GO GO!" thats how i evade my brother~ =3="~ lol~ then update something at my laptop~ ok ~ after that go Bliss 33 for lunch~ after reach there for less than 3 minutes~ Mr.Jon called me "Ray Where are u? It's 2.30 d~ Omg I forgot jon asked me for a lunch at OldTown taipan~ then i quickly fly to taipan with my bicycle~ ~ cycle cycle cycle~ my bike made a funny sound~ *creak creak creak creak~ tak tak tak tak~ diiiiiiiiiinnnnngggg ~ then check my bike lol~ tyre got problem d and the break ~ haizz~ go taipan ~i called half-boiled egg for my lunch~ lol~ only~ after that 3.30p.m~ i go and find mervin~ he ask me to teach him how to take a bus to carefour near to subang parade there~ Omg 3.35 reach his house~ then walk to bus stop 3.46~ then wait there until 4.15 only got bus Rapid~ zzz sienz~ 4.45 reach~ then buy things lor~ awesome! garlic bread 4 in 1 packet for 1.50~ so i grabbed 1 packet! :D i should grab 2~ hmm~ oh well~ going home time 5.25~ wait for bus again ~ this time faster la~ 5.40 got Bus Mini~ omg~ so freaking dirty~ dunno wat to say~ then mervin told me "this is the worst bus i ever ride! I'm not gonna take any bus!" LOL~ ~ traffic jam~ Coz got 1 guy accident~ and i saw a dead body~No Helmet zz~  OMG motorbike accident~ zz  zzz Sunway Pyramid made the bus flooded~ ~ squeezed like sardines zz~ ~  felt like sauna in the bus for 50 minutes! Omg~ reach at 6.30 p.m~ ~ and i thought my day over d~ Oh~ i still got a bike to fix~ zz~ so i went to motorbike shop to fix my bike~ he said finish tiub~ omg~ then i quickly fly to ss15~ bicycle shop to fix my bike~ coz ~ closing time is 7p.m~ ~ juz went there and he said ~ "What happen to ur bike?! where u been??" i said Puchong :D~ then he give me the epic OMG face ~ lol~ fix fix fix~ ok everything fix~ now my bike is smexy :D but my money flew away lol~ RM47 gone~ lolz~ reach home straight blogy xD

FIN

BeeN doing crazy stuff since morning~

Omg Lol~ i think im high~ but i didnt even take an high pills nor~ beerz~
hmmm maybe today is the day im very hyper~ lalALAlala~ WeeeEee~
I'm Psychotic Guy With a Life full of mysteries and joy~ Bla bla Bla

Just now when Mydin~ Damn Funny Lol! Everyone staring at me

as if i'm a Crazy Guy! ahAHah :DD LALalaLaLalaAL~ Blah

ran around with 10 packets of potato chips in Mydin :D HehEHehEH

AwesomE day :D and unforgettable 17/4/2011

Omg lol~ everything juz went insane~
from morning to night i been outside Awesome~ :D
pecah rekod again~ :) fly to puchong hahah xD
cant belive so easy onie ~ :P my furthest location
*by bicycle* hehe

waaa~ juz now so awesome ~ i saw moon with CA
and the moon is so Big and its around 7.10 like that~ hmm
not bad ~ moon brings hope :D it means
GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES! 


and moon represent my heart x)...


The END

you smile i smile :D

blah blah blah~ happy day ~ Yes! well ~ happy happy happy
i dunno how to describe happy but im really happy :D
So Freaking Happy !! :D C:

From Morning Im Happy Like hell! :D


I can Feel this universe is so small! :D
                                                                                                                                                                                                        

 
Epic happy Troll Face! LOL!














And in the meant time everyone showing me this! :D

Almost forgot ~ i just bought attire for Fn! :D

 1st choice blah short sleeves~ plz gimme ur comment :D

                                    FULL GEAR!

                                   IMBA :P

                                  no smile

                                 smile :D

U thought me how to smile C:

What the Hag~ zz

Lol~ today pameran anti dadah at school~
damn funny lor~ ponteng a few period just to
see pictures of corpses? LOL! i'm gonna sick soon~
anyway got  pictures of weapon ~ kongsi gelap
really gelap~ any kind of weapon oso got ~ pro~
got brass knuckles, bruce lee most epic weapon( dunno whats the name )
:P , Gun, dagger, Jabber, scimitars~ LOL~
kongsi gelap best collection lol!

Omg i cant see wat all my friend posted on my wall and comment~ zz
its stuck to yesterday news feed zz ~ curse it~ *yawn* blog in better! :D

Fark U!

Hei ~ hei You ya you u son of a Bit*h!
do u know what is grow up?! u son of a bit*h
never learn~ u juz sit there and talk all the crap
you 1! and be the bosses in the house?! u think
u so big? u are acting like a rat! outside of the house!
much more worst! U SUCKS! u dont worth to be my brother!
unworthy initiate! 1 sentences!  u will never learn from ur mistake if
u juz kick and destroy my things like a raged stupid kid~ *spit*
get out from my sight~

~sometimes i can't think straight~

pfft~ wat a bad day~ i have to listen to a philosophy
for 1 hour from a random girl? oh well im not
paying attention anyway :PP~

Helping my friend to clean the shit job~
oh well hopefully the job is done~
none of us will have to strike up with this
stupid convo anymore~zz

sometimes in our life ~ we will go through~
bad times, good times~ but the question is
do u have the guts to face it!~
and the resilience to repel it! come on ~ u can go
through this~ people around u cant help u much
they onie can give u a god damn good advice
but if that advice is so god damn good~ and u didn't
take any initiative to motivate ur self to go through this
you are still stuck in ur god damn good box ~ u will
never get out~ until maybe a few years ~ i don't know
depends on yourself~

i felt sad when u had a bad times~ ~ but i can help u
onie by giving u advice~ people around u also will
give u advice to~ so be happy ~ change this bad thing
to a good thing :) u can go thru this~ i trust u...

OMG Sorry again~

SORRY~ i FORGOT again`~ MY MIND were empty nothing~
I was left on idle~ i cant think of anything~  but oh well ~
now i found a new way~ if i forget ~ i will hack my head
1 time~ forget again hack twice~ and then so on and on~

oh well u can't eat spicy stuff eh~
so do u prefer tomato? or u juz want it plain @@

$$ not enough ><"

~ lol juz now go check out all the attire ~
for a sec my face from happy changed to EPIC
i like OMG! why so CHEAP! OMG THAT 1
IS CHEAP 2~ ~

then i had a peek in my wallet~ Oh~
Its Empty~ :DD WEEE~ so go home empty
handed~ :(~ Wherez MAi Money POPULAR!! D:

I love roti FLOOD :P

Awesome day playing badminton with SomEOne! hmmm :D
oh well i got exhausted anyway~ the sun is scorching hot we still continue playing~

OMG juz now my friend told me about Mr Charles~
unknowingly he was upstairs walking at the corridor there
I think he heard my conversation D: Don't KILL ME ><" I HAVE A WIFE TO LOOK AFTER :PP

>..<|||

OMG~ why u all so 8 1~ gila ar?!

today damn freaking busy~ until i got headache~ 

all the teacher looking for me~ =="

I'M WANTED!

sad sad sad T^T 

i didn't stalk you ar~ 

sorry if i scared you really sorry >...<"

Love Love Love....

love~ love is so complicated even i oso can't predict what will happen next~ if i keep on thinking what is love~ my brain could explode anytime~ i should wait ~ i dont care how long i will just keep waiting ~ for love is eternity :) 

keep on waiting maybe my hair will turn grey~ but i dont care coz i love u so much i can abandon myself and let it be :)

Money Is Not Everything The Real Author Ryozo Takashi

Through Research~ Money is greatly affecting the society! it's Horrible~ EVERYONE IS CHASING FOR MONEY!! Well i can tell u that Money is not everything~ Based on my experiences~ well i was one of the chasing money teenager~ I WAS~ hmm~ but i'm still 17 this year~ oh well~ it's all started when i was 14~ i started working with my siblings ~ my mother's sister's Husband~ it was a tough job back then ~ but still i enjoyed it :) i work as a Promoter ~ i sell WaterFilters~ hmm~ well~ after working for a few months~ i changed my job~ i work with my mother's brother ~ well this time i work as a plumber~ i can tell u 1 thing ... I LOVE CLIMBING!! It's FUN!~ and fixing things i also love it~ hmmm i think it's in my blood~ since my mother's dad owned a hardware shop~ ahh a good memories back then~ after i get experience from both of my uncle~ i started working with other people ~ my hardwork paid off~ it was easy~ and i get along with people very well~ it is a gift or a curse ~ hmm who knows~ But I Like It :DD  <Experience is money~ don't chase money for you will never get it~ try Chase For Experience!! then Money Will CHASE YOU!!!-Raymond Wong-Ryozo Takashi-The Author->